It’s hard to believe only a few minutes before we had been a family of five, and, in just a moment it all changed. Every once in a while you hear an insensitive adoption comment -- “ Wow, you adopted. You took the easy way out -- no morning sickness, no labour pains -- that’s awesome! It is all I can do to give a restrained smile and think, “ The easy way out??? We waited 5 years, filled out hundred of forms, spent thousands of dollars. And during that gestation period we worried and wondered, had stressful days, and sleepness nights while we tried to prove ourselves to provincial, federal and international governments that we were ready and worthy to accept a child. And even then, a child with special needs who may require surgery, then therapy and a number of years to overcome effects of abandonment and attachment.
No it’s not pregnancy, nor a traditional labour and delivery but please, please, don’t tell us we took the easy way out.
But that said, not unlike a traditional labour and delivery, in one sweet blissful moment all the worrying and wondering is swept away as you look into the face of a little child that you know has been part of you for a lot longer than the time you have spent holding her.
When I asked a friend what motivates or inspires her to run marathons -- a feat I can’t even imagine having the drive or desire to do -- she said that there is a feeling that comes when you conclude a race, this combination of exhaustion and emotion that is completely thrilling and fulfilling and unlike anything else she has ever experienced. Adoption -- and even traditional childbirth -- is the same way. In that moment, it is all worth it.
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